Thursday, August 30, 2012

Perks of a Long Distance Marriage...

Let’s talk about the perks of a long-distance marriage, shall we?

  • There’s No Fashion Police! I can wear whatever I want!! Sweatpants, Uggs, garter-belts, Snuggies, leotards, hammer pants, overalls, or nothing at all! You can’t do that with a husband around (especially hammer pants!) without them thinking you’re a weirdo. Its a special kind of luxury that I shouldn’t take for granted. Plus, You never have to worry about how awful you look when you wake up, since no one else is going to see you.

  • You can still harbor some of your secret single behavior that you hide around your significant other for fear of judgement (like drinking bottles of wine and watching lifetime movies, honey boo boo, or teen mom... by myself).
  • You don’t have to fight for the shower first thing in the morning.
  • You get full control of the remote and TV.
  • You can stay up as late as needed reading, writing, working, or dancing around in your underwear without worrying about waking someone up or hearing “Aren’t you going to sleep yet?”  
  • Staying up all night.
  • Examining your pores nightly in a mirror.
  • Coming home late at night and attempting to cook things.
  • Never closing the bathroom door.
  • Talking to your cat. 
  • Never eating actual proper meals. Small bag of Doritos for dinner, why not?
  • Being weird.
Whenever I think about all the people in a long distance marriage living alone, a question comes up:

What if those weird couples living alone become so set in their bizarre behaviors that they can never live with someone, you know, properly?  But I doubt they'll change all of their "quirky" habits then, nor should they really have to. People are weird. I am weird. Living with someone else isn't going to change that. In fact, I can't wait until Derrick just sees how weird I actually am.

Feel free to comment... I would just love to know what you think. =]

Reasons why living alone... SUCKS.

How do we make our long distance marriage work? One day at a time. There's a lot of people who question how Derrick and I do this. You have to understand that this is considered "normal" for us. We don't know any different. Those short 10 months we actually lived in the same city together was an eye opener. I loved it. We watched TV together, cooked dinner together, folded clothes together, went shopping together... are you seeing the word trend?? TOGETHER. D and I were pretty much inseparable, well except for hunting season... if I wanted to see him I had to go too. Now that we are living apart, I find a new reason everyday on why we should live together. For example:

My garbage disposal clogged up and it smelled like a rotten mess.-- called a plumber who was nice enough to do it for $50 bucks.
My cat brought in a dead chipmunk.-- I fished it out from underneath the dryer.
My cable box broke and I couldn't get the stupid thing out of the entertainment center nor knew how to set the stupid thing up.-- I spent 2 hours getting it out and scratched the thing to death, waited for D to get home. haha
My tire was low on air.-- waited for Derrick again.
My closet fell down.-- Thank God daddy was in town.
My dog was extremely sick and pooped everywhereeeeeee.-- called my trusty God dog parents.
I couldn't find my strapless bra anywhere and Derrick can find anything within the first 2 places he looks.-- waited for Derrick to find it.
My vacuum ate the cord and stripped the wire coating and I had exposed wires sticking out. -- I fixed this, GO ME!
My bed frame broke.-- it's still broken.
I needed to drop the car off at the shop and didn't have anyone to pick me up.-- called madre and padre.
My garage down opener quit working. --went to Lowe's to get new batteries, still didn't work, waited for Derrick again.

Now, wouldn't it just be awesome to have my husband home to help me? I hate asking anyone for help. 1. Nobody likes doing favors. 2. I don't want to inconvenience anyone. 3. I'll just figure it out. You know... I wonder if Derrick has a list of stuff he needs help with?? I know he only eats ham sandwiches and cereal and I had to pretty much teach him how to make Velveeta mac & cheese. I should probably ask him...

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

I can SEE clearly now...

For starters... I have yet to figure out why my pictures in my older blog posts aren't showing up. =[

Since the last time I blogged.. I got new eyes, or vision really. I can wake up every morning and see! My eyes still get tired at night and right before I turn to go to bed I still act like I have to take my contacts out. All I do now is put my drops in and go to bed =] It's beauuutiful. Nights alone aren't near as scary anymore because I can open my eyes and see everything!

One of my best friends that lives in Auburn took me to get my lasik done, she went to work while I was getting all my tests run on my eyes. The doctor said my vision is the worst he's seen in a while... EEeekkk. I called Britni right before it was time to have the surgery so she can come and be there with me. She got to watch the entire thing close up on a TV. EWWW! I refused to watch videos of it being done because I was already wigged out about enough.. especially not having anyone there with me the entire time because mom and dad left to go back to work and Derrick also had to work that day--he just so happened to be on first shift and couldn't take me =[.

 It was probably the longest six minutes of my life.

They put this paper clip looking contraption on your eye to keep your eyelids open. Then put this suction cup thing on your eye to keep it still. Then while they are cutting the flap... everything goes black. I'm talking like hyperventilating.. OMG. Then you slowly start to see again and the laser starts.. it starts flashing.. it makes a loud popping noise and it smells like burnt hair. SICK.

I found this illustration online, I would rather use this cartoon generated looking one then the actual eyeball one.. it looks disgusting. I could never be a nurse or doctor or anything that has to do with body parts. I got up out of the chair--walked out-- grabbed my purse and was headed out the door. Everything was realllllly realllllly blurry.  Britni and I grabbed lunch at Zaxby's then I went home and took a nap. I woke up about the time Derrick got home from work and I could see! I can't see at night.. my vision looks like this.. They are called star bursts and halos.
Yes those are headlights.. and No, I am not stepping foot in my car at night. The doctor said to give it about 3 months and I should be able to see normal again. It took me about a week and a half to be able to read or see the computer really well. But I can see awesome, other than that! It's like I have my contacts in! I recommend this to anybody who is thinking about Lasik but is toooo scared. It's not that bad at all. It's the fear and the anxiety of it all that got to me. It didn't hurt not one bit. Just felt like your pupils were dilated... because they were, Ha! I went to Hollis Lasik in Auburn. They were running a special for $595 an eye so I couldn't pass that up.
My last day to wear glasses.. EVER! =]